The 5 Love Languages of Children

A baby is such a precious gift, a special little addition, loved and welcomed by each member of the family. Of course there is always a huge adjustment, as everyone adapts to the needs of a new baby! Feeding and bathing, dressing and cuddling, changing and loving quickly become part of our daily life.


As a baby grows over the first few months, it is interesting to observe the development of a personality! Did you know that this little individual has his or her own preference on how to receive love? Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell have written a wonderful book called “The Five Love Languages of Children”, in which they describes the five ways that children give and receive love. In fact, adults and children alike show a preference for one or two of these five love languages. So to make sure that your child feels loved by you, it is wise to learn, over time, to speak their primary love language.


It is also important to note, however, that all children need all the five love languages in some measure every day! Caring touch, loving words of affirmation, an extended period of quality time with parents, acts of service and gifts are all important to a child. And when parents place an extra emphasis on the one or two love languages that really make that child feel loved and nurtured, he or she will show all the benefits of feeling secure in their parents’ love.

In the early years of a child’s life, when every thing they do is a new and sometimes daunting challenge, keeping a child’s love tank full is an important part of smooth development. A child who receives an abundance of words of love and encouragement can move more confidently into trying new things. A snuggly cuddle with dad might be just what another child needs for reassurance and security. Perhaps just playing quietly on the floor on a Saturday morning, doing quality time together, may settle a little boy who needs time with Mom or Dad. Finding time to read together is also an opportunity to combine touch, words and quality time in a special moment at the end of each day. And having mom or dad make something, even imperfect, for you, is a loving goal for acts of service.


In a very busy world, it is important to move past functional relating (chores, feeding, clothing and surviving activities) to loving interaction on a daily basis with children of all ages. Filling the love tank in the morning, afternoon and before bedtime is an excellent goal for each day!


Ann Richardson  RN, RM

Private Nurse Practitioner
Dedicated to managing your well baby
Author and Parent Coach


011 465 3480/8



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